Looking back, one of the most crucial elements limiting my success has been me. It sounds trite, but my motivation was not to be the best. My motivation was to earn praise.
I come from a Mexican American family, and grew up with a healthy dose of criticism coupled with a reliance on corporal punishment. A sign on my parent’s fridge said it all. It depicted a finger pointing at the viewer and read, “The beatings will continue until morale improves.”
To be clear, I was never beaten. It was just the mentality, and taught me to behave well in order to avoid punishment.
Praise wasn’t earned by doing chores or being good. Praise was earned by achievement. I had a natural ability to learn, and made good grades easily. Anything less than first wasn’t good enough. So I worked my tail off to be the best, improving my scores in every class, and accelerating my learning beyond the classroom.
Then I started playing football. As I learned the game and developed physically, I started earning praise. By the time I was in high school, I was an honor’s student athlete. The praise I earned from football, and also theater performances, covered some of the criticism I received for getting B’s in honor’s classes. To be fair, if the B would have dropped my GPA below 4, I think the criticism would have ramped up and I would have raised my grade.
The point is, I did not try to be a champion. I didn’t try to be a champion in school. I didn’t try to be a champion in sports. I was good enough to be one of the best, but I was never elite.
That’s a hard thing to admit. But the years I’ve spent since high school, analyzing and re-analyzing my life led me to realize and accept it.
Most of us aren’t champions. Most of us have never been elite. Most of us have never given everything we have to give. It was three months ago that I realized my life needed to change. And that I would have to take it in steps. Not to become a better version of myself, although a better version would be good. I needed to take it in steps to become the best version of myself.
I’ve used apps before. I’ve lifted weights before. I’ve counted calories and carbs before. The difference is developing the discipline and drive to get it done every day.
That’s why I am so glad I have my Fitbit. It so closely tracks my steps and translates the caloric value of those steps so I can better manage my diet. It’s why I’m so glad I use MyFitnessPal. It has the most accurate quantities of calories for the widest variety of foods I eat. I don’t have to weigh my food or guess. I know how many calories I’m consuming even when I eat at most restaurants.
It’s not the perfect system. But it is a system that has worked for three months and helped me lose 21 pounds and drop from 4XL shirts to 2XL. I’m a stone’s throw from wearing 44” Wranglers again.
We’ll talk about how old clothes can help motivate you tomorrow.
